people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
I think thanksgiving was created so we could all be thankful that we're still alive after the night before.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i used baking grease as lip gloss
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
Wine floats aren't as good of an idea as they seem
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
He drunk dialed me at 2am asking if he could put a baby in me.
She asked if I wanted to "Mormon Motorboat" her, which I guess is just motor-boating her through her cloths. Turns out I did.
He's scared I want a relationship? How does texting him at three am and sleeping with four of my exes symbolize that?
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
He made me chicken tenders and margaritas in preparation for me to take a pregnancy test at his place later tonight. Like...seriously.
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