How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
I'm sorry. I know you didn't expect me to be arm deep in vagina when you walked through the door.
I'll hold a taco with my boobs for you
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
I feel bad for her, but I feel like she's one of those resource-raping alien civilizations that visits planets, decimates them and then leaves. Those really aren't the qualities I appreciate in a friend. Ya know?
This is Jewish guilt versus Irish Catholic guilt. We should tread carefully, or we could fuck up the space-time continuum or something.
I'm okay with that.
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Bro i just made a pipe out of a mechanical pencil and the top to an eye drop bottle. Does that make me some kind of pot god?
Randomize
