nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
i just heard someone have an orgasm and then throw up through the vent in my room.
last night was the icing on my 3 week vodka binge cake
I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore...
Come on. It's already happy hour in Europe...Man up. "I'm at work" and "it's a tuesday" are not valid excuses.
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
you just knocked on the window of the ambulance and waved at me as we drove away
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
Just text him and be like do you want this pussy or not. You have three seconds to respond.
I'm trying to get laid this Halloween, not inspire the next season of AHS
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
I just paid a hobo to give me his Santa hat so I can take Christmas nudes. Will send them later, they're fire.
I should buy myself lingerie for Valentine’s Day instead of a present for you because I am the present
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