My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
I walked into cold stone and the guy started preparing a supersized birthday cake remix for "Mrs. Munchies"
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
Code red. She won't talk to me. Maybe it has something to do with her raccoon eyes. Perry said there was a brief moment of towel fighting until you passed out. Did you draw the turtle on my ass?
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
I can't even look at my running shoes. I swear I drank more in the last 2 days than the last 6 months combined
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
I couldn't drown my sorrows in an ocean of jack daniels. They may have scuba gear.
Today I left one job interview, showed up randomly at his house for a midday bootycall then left right after to attend my second job interview. I got both jobs
the last time I drank tequila I ended up riding your skateboard nude down the street... so yeah, I'll have a few shots.
IT'S MY BIRTHDAY. I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO DRIVE 3 HOURS FOR BIRTHDAY SEX.
Yoooooo, the fat magician married the chick I dumped a beer on after I got pissed he was flirting with her in front of me
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