just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
I just hit myself in the face while taking off my shirt. I could never be a stripper.
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You and your vagina are hellbent on selfdestruction and bad decisions
Dude...can we put that on a tshirt? I will totally sport that shit.
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
I feel like sleeping with foreign people is a long term investment. It's like a time share. Now when I go to London I have a place to stay.
And then he served me a piece of a brownie on his dick. It tasted amazing. Such a good night!
Oh, the accent alone guaranteed a bj. It was when he started drunkenly singing in PERFECT PITCH that I knew I was fucking him.
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