yo i have your phone
... oh so you probably won't get this message
Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
She wouldn't stop saying her own name. Like a damn pokemon.
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
i always knew that i'd have sex in your room, i just assumed it would be with you
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
just had Stella and stale goldfish for breakfast under the watchful eyes of an inflatable cactus and 5 llama pinatas. Cinco de mayo success!
I have whiskey and jager. There's no telling what kind of monster will emerge
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
I'm taking myself to the hospital right now b/c there is no way this erection is subsiding in the next 4 hours.
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
like when you break up with someone your virginity slowly starts to grow back & when it's done it's like ding ding ding you're ready to date again
Randomize
