life lesson learned today: sleeping pills and laxatives don't mix.
Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
I just spent my entire state tax return on sex toys
And the sky opened up and god said.... "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!!!!"
So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest.
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
Give me one good reason why I should go with you.
Free beer.
..pick me up at 8.
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