How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.
she sang that "this little piggy song" to my balls. and somehow made it work, with me only having two balls instead of five.
Someone in my history class just FB messaged me saying they highly suggest I put my sunglasses on. He is sitting 18 rows in front of me...
She put baby oil on her toes and i am not legally allowed to talk about what happened
There is something about weddings and lines being done off my ass
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
Don't ever give your dog some hamburger at midnight. Its impossible to enjoy a late night burger when your dog just threw it up all over your carpet. Gremlin rules work with dogs.
I asked for my Beats earbuds back and he sent me a pic of them tied around his penis. Now I miss both my great ear buds and his great dick
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
Putting a bow on your dick doesn't make it a real present
I just want to get drunk and not have to worry about you leaving me at the bar.
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
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