if i died would you start the facebook group?
Okay, we really need to start training for the St Pattys parade. 48 hours of green beer won't end well if we don't prep ourselves. 2 week bender starts now
When you gave the girl your number the fat girl was like "take mine....here please take mine"
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
We woke up in the room with a hamburger patty on the bed side table, one bun across the room, and the other bun under my pillow. Still don't know who ordered room service.
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
I found his Linkedin the day after he created it. Too stalkerish or just right?
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
Apparently mr clean magic erasers don't clean blood off the ceiling
Bonded with the ladies at the perfume outlet by saying "help me smell like i'm not hungover before my shift starts". This is not where I wanted my life to be
Shooting a bottle rocket from my penis was entirely justified. Twenty bucks is twenty buck no matter how you look at it
But the problem is you celebrate with your heart but I celebrate with my liver
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
OH GOD IT TASTES LIKE IT SMELLS
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