I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
Douche bag was crowd surfing, sack punched him. Crowd carried him away in a ball of agony. LIFE=COMPLETE.
No gay bar. My eyemake up looks like sex and Im using these dick daggers of mine tonight.
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
i snuck out to taco bell in my hospital gown earlier
My one night stand said I love you, opened my fridge, stole my cream cheese and left.
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
I need to learn how to not be a fucking liability
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
I just saw a guy in a zippo shirt buy 2 gallons of fire starter fluid and then proceed to smoke a cigarette. I feel like hes got some big plans for his tuesday.
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