in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
Baby momma caught me doing baby daddy in reverse cowgirl. She kicked me out and i have no clothes, come get me.
I hope you walked the shit out of that shame.
Denmark girl wants me to go out but i remembered shes a raging whore with extremely questionable morals. Not feelin that tonight
I woke up to the bathroom door of steak n shake hitting me in the face at 4 in the morning...
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
The prostitute across the street from us is having a seizure on her front lawn again.
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
Can you explain to me why there are fake boobs glued on my chest?
you know it was a successful halloween when you wake up and have a firecracker in your tits
Blacked out drunk in California and woke up somewhere in Arizona, I'm pretty sure I got here on foot
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't
Puking out the window is really hard when you're the one driving.
I was dressed as Waldo and the cops kept saying looks like we fuckin found you
Randomize
