I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
Hillary is trying to make pickle pops with vodka and sell them to kids at the ball park.
I'm convinced that college is the only place where one can have an existential crisis over what sweatpants to wear
Eye surgery went well. Just can't believe it took getting lasers through my eyes to temporarily stop the vivid sex dreams I was having
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
I wanna get to the point where I can just send a question mark and get an exclamation point in response
so how about you dont randomly call my mother during parties?
Randomize
