I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
Come here. I'm drunk. Family Function. Intense Pro-life vs. Pro-choice debate. Bring Republicans.
there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
who knew that if you vomit while skydiving the puke goes up towards the people that are behind you.
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
Just threw up in nordstroms while shopping for moms bday with dad. He distracted workers for me. No more tequila
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
theres a wall by my room thats like, a prime fucking wall. before i move out SOMEBODY is gonna fuck me on that wall, goddamnit.
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
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