you turned your livingroom into a bong?
we were having sex in the bathroom when his aunt knocked on the door
and rather than go out and meet her, i climbed out the window. so now she thinks he was masturbating and moaning his own name in a really girly voice
And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
Dude we need to petition the city about running buses later, none of my booty calls own cars
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
Ummm so does anybody remember me stopping to get my ear peirced last night and make an earring out of a staple? Or did I just somehow lay on this thing and ram it through my ear?
Ok I'm good with that cause I'm gonna disappear for 90 days
Are you goin to rehab again?
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
I deleted my history right in front of my girlfriend w/out her seeing. Let's go skydiving with no parachutes. I can live thru anything.
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
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