in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
my vag is singing 'hurts so good' by john mellencamp
Whenever I don't wipe thoroughly after shitting, I just think that anyone if anyone sticks their finger up my ass, they had it coming.
I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
I couldn't sleep so I took 4 shots of vodka and promptly threw up in the sink. Happy Thursday
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
I accused him of not drinking enough alcohol and eating tacos after midnight. I was sober and he's not a gremlin. I would say bad.
She took her panties off, then farted in my general direction. I guess we're at that stage in our relationship.
That moment when you sit down to shit and someone is watching porn on the other side of the wall.
I just found your shirt hanging in a tree 4 blocks from the party...in the opposite direction of your house. where are you going?
admittedly, geting that drunk in front of my last two exes wasnt a good idea
probably didn't help that you cheated on them with each other either
Randomize