i have your red jacket for some reason. and a good deal of shame and embarasment. note to self, wear underwear when you wear a dress. also, i was electrocuted last night. dont ask how.
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
Why is your signature on my underwear?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
Peeing in public by noon, this is not a good indicator for the day.
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
that is either the most profound and meaningful thing i've ever heard, or someone got high before noon again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
WEED BROWNIES! He put weed in my brownie mix! And he got it from YYYYOOOOUUUU!
Look at the bright side mom. After 20 years dad is still capable of surprising you!
Shut up Max.
So I don't think the seahorse breeding thing is gonna work.
That was random, even for you Mom.
You kept telling everyone that you were as sober as a camel. I have yet to figure out what that means
The worst part is there are all kinds of happy creatures out here like fucking snow white and i'm sitting in semi-dead grass, hungover with a burnt butt
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
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