weed, chlorine, and victory. my bed smells like i had sex with michael phelps.
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
Dude...I'm drunk from Wednesday stilll.
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm glad we have the kind of friendship where if either of us is too drunk to fuck a hot guy, we pass the responsibility to each other and get the job done.
I just re read that. We really need to get our lives together.
All I got from that conversation with the officer was "blah blah blah, you're disgusting, blah blah blah, $500 fine, blah blah blah, be in court Tuesday."
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
I need you to know that everytime my toddler does the downward facing dog in the nude I think about the night you and your dude fell in love.
I think we've entered a low point in our relationship when I'm sending you pictures of pubic hair designs "because they're funny"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
For starters i called the cops on myself for trying to destroy the ladys decorations
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
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