I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
Honestly, your dog is in better hands with that homeless guy.
I had something called a trashcan. Never again. I almost fucked chewbacca.
Do you know how hard it is to maintain a conversation with someone who just told you they put their cat in the fridge on purpose?
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
Did you have ill-advised lesbian sex on the deathbed of their relationship?
Of course. Go big or go home.
You're my fucking queen.
Well if homeless lesbian experimenting divorcée is your new M.O., you're gonna need to start drinking more anyway so if that's what it takes to talk about it tomorrow afternoon, bottoms up bitch
I was drunk and on Craigslist.. The drunk-text offers people got must have been either horrifying or glorious
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
So I was having a really bad night...so I decided to steal a pumpkin.
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
Randomize
