you know you are hungover when... you set your alarm for the next time you think you are going to throw up
Just mixed Baileys and yoohoo. I feel like an alchoholic 2nd grader.
if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
Just threw up in the garbage can outside the liquor store... I'm pretty sure that's some sort of distress signal.
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
Ima go for a jog. and I'm going to jog until I throw up a lung. then I'll crawl home.
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
And you will no longer be getting a thank you note from my vagina
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
my boobs just made me lose a game of beer pong. the balls hit them, bounced off and into the cup. twice. ive never been so disappointed in them.
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
Randomize
