drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
I was so high that i was talking shit about a girl I was with via text, and I handed the phone to her so she could type the shit I was trying to say.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its midnight, he's burning water on the stove and keeps yelling at me and telling me not to burn myself.
Yea. I think between making the bride puke, feeling up the maid of honor, and sleeping with a bridesmaid. I did my part.
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
It hurts to peel the glue off my chest and i keep finding glitter in my hair.
I just wanted to decorate you...
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
Well to me, someone is not really my friend until we go to a mcdonalds drunk at 4am. It's like a right of passage
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
You know your Halloween costume is slutty when you have to shave your pubes to wear it.
im so drunk that this cat is mothering me. aggressively
where the fuck are you? she just tazed two people and we're tripping shrooms...successful first night in new apartment!
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