we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
what time did you get home last night?
SO late...when your in the lap of a 35 year old superstar you loose track of time
He said to me " i could be your father but i dont care"...it was so hott
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
I decided that not getting a job after college is gods way of telling me I will make a great housewife
I swear it's like I have a jerk off quota I have to meet each week. If I miss three days I have a wet dream and it's like a wasted jizz, and it gets everywhereeeeeee.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
i knew you were okay when you wanted to eat in the ambulance
I feel like I have two modes: Super fuckin high, or super giddy from caffeine. I have learned to accept this.
Tim and I found you a 5ish and asked how you were doing with the breakup. All you said was "i can't words"
He asked me if I remembered touching his police badge. awk.
How the hell do you misplace a bag of tacos in a closet?
Afterwards he face timed like four of his friends screaming he banged the hot intern.
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
Seriously considering taking a nap at lunchtime in my car. That. Hung. Over.
Randomize
