I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
I really want to know why half of my kitchen floor is missing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
Yea i think drunk-me kept all my bar receipts, just to throw it in sober-me's face.
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
I just came inside of a Gatorade bottle. That hungover.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Everyone was trying to get you to do a keg stand but you refused & instead declared you could do it yourself, crouched on the keg in your 6 inch heels, leaned over, and gave yourself one.
So hungover im counting my own breaths to make sure im not dead. The odds hurt.
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
I took an uber home at 6am. Went to Santanas, apparently they don't take american express. So the uber driver bought my burrito. Success!
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
Ugh I don't want to adult today. I need like a dozen more coffees. Or cookies. They're interchangeable.
Randomize