i have a reoccuring irrational fear i'm going to walk in on my dad masterbating. Night.
im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
Highlight of my weekend: having my card suspended due to "suspicious charges" and standing in line at the gas station yelling at customer service on the phone that I really did go to 4 different strip clubs in one night
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
Great. I will show up in your office wearing only oven mitts later today.
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
Vodka, rum, moonshine, I don't care, just bring like 5gallons.
I can't open my mouth wide enough to make full use of this snapchate update
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
Straight up just cock blocked my dad. Also this apple sauce is good.
Randomize
