You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
Woke up with a migrane, threw up blood, then my headache went away. I'm going to convince myself that it was just a bad batch of blood so I can drink again tonight
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
You're obviously not trying hard enough. GET LAID. Kittens die for less.
Touche salesman.
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
Just used an eyelash curler to open my beer since I didn't have a bottle opener. Things are starting to look up.
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
I once broke a mans heart just to get laid by a premature ejaculator
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
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