haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
I feel like tequila is Gods way of lighting my fuse to do something awesome
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
Talking to this girl is like playing minesweeper on hard. There's red flags everywhere.
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
He kept coming back from the bar with hotter girls and just left with two...I feel like I just witnessed something amaZing. Like meeting Jesus and finding out he has no morals either
If the boyfriend of the drunk girl you just met asks her if she made a "special friend" you're going to have a threesome. For future reference.
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
Hey. Im sorry to bother you but I just watched the seinfield episode about faking an orgasm and it caused me to second guess myself. Were you satisfied?
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
Randomize
