I microwaved pizza rolls, a hot dog, and bacon in the same plate with no paper towels. I drank the grease at the end. I'm going to vomit everywhere.
just chased whiskey with a pickle. i definitely recommend it
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
he attacked my vagina with the force of a thousand suns
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
This Pinterest wedding planning is a good distraction. I'm great at this, my imaginary wedding is beautiful
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
I wasn't even hungover I was just mourning my dignity
I now have a "weirdest thing a guy ever did in bed" story. Cut my fingernails.
Yeah I'm gonna need you to stop it right there.I know this is supposed to be a safe space but Imma have to exit.
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
Oh my fucking god!! There is a barefoot white guy with a fucking ninja sword in the middle of the street next to the pride gas station swinging his sword at peoples cars!! He almost got me. 3 people swerved off the road and stopped. I told a cop.
i cant go to his party cause last time i pressed the red buttons on the wall and the fire alarm went off for 40 minutes, i'm not allowed back there
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
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