the condom got lost in my hair
the girl sitting next to me in class is using her birth control box as a ruler
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
What did you give her? She's trying to tape her wrists so her hands don't fall off.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Found plan b box covered with blood. In kitchen sick. Pickle jar is empty. Wtf happened?
Dude, you passed out sitting straight up AND in mid sentence last night
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
And then you two got up and shouted in near perfect unison "I'M ALWAYS A SLUT FOR BASKIN ROBBINS" The bar just looked at us horrified.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
You have a husband. I have a bag full of electronics. This, is the single life.
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
I just did a bump with my mom so I’d sober up for Black Friday shopping
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
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