Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
You know whats sad? As I walk past the campus daycare i cant help think, look at those drunk mistakes
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
This conversation has now reached a level of awkward that even a passerby streaking hobo couldn't break.
you and him went to the park at 2am to "catch a pigeon" and ACTUALLY CAME BACK WITH A PIGEON
Reports of my death were greatly exaggerated.
Im part way to drunk.
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
I walked in describing her boobs thinking I was talking to you only to hear dad say 'I remember when your moms were like that'. ALWAYS tell me when they get home early. Always
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
Randomize
