Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
Only you could turn Mozart into a stripper song.
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
SANTA'S REAL. I GOT MY PERIOD.
Just had my ass outlined on a bar top with permanent marker and then they carved the imprint into the wood with a knife. I'm famous in the country!
Nothing is more awkward than taking a dump while someone is crying in the bathroom.
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
my extended weekend of being as irresponsible as possible started with blowing the bartender in the bar bathroom. off to a good start.
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
I know you want to take a pregnancy test, but could you wait until Sunday so it doesn't ruin our weekend
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