remember that time that crown gas station wouldn't sell us a lighter so we had to use matches and birthday candles to smoke with a toilet paper roll? sometimes i miss high school
don't bother texting me at 10. my pants WILL be off and I'm not putting them back on to come see you.
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
Like fighting the continuous urge to sing Neil diamond "coming to America" kinda fucked up right now
There was a reason God said "Let there be titties" on the Fifth Day.
when seducing a hipster, do you think taking a nude pic on a lomo-camera app would increase my chances? grainy off-colored boobs and telling him how much i like reading salinger?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
there's cocaine on the ipad again........... was your sister here last night?
Sunday mornings are confusing. Like. I can't decide if I want to go for a run or start drinking
I'm actually kind of scared about the prospect of us living together. We're just going to eat pizza and drink wine before retiring to our rooms with vibrators
Nothing has ever been more true. Ever.
If the guys trying to booty call text me could see me right now in some raggedy pajamas with toothpaste down the front of my shirt eating pepperoni out of the package they might change their minds
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
What?? I could've slept with an ordained minister!
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