their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
Remember when we made you finish your beer after you puked into your glass?
i hate being the asshole.
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
Its not even real halloween yet. This extremely toxic yet briliant costume is going to kill me
That stripper was not happy when I tried putting a dollar in her court mandated ankle bracket/tracking device
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
I'm experimenting with sincerity
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
you tried to drunkinly do the backflip kick off of karate kid and broke the big screen
Sometimes the most spiritual fucking thing to do is punch somebody in the face.
i feel like if my pee,blood, or vomit is on it...it should belong to me by default. can we make that a rule?
Randomize
