Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
I brought my laptop into the bathroom so I can facebook while vomiting. New low?
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
I just recorded courtney puking and set it as my ringtone.
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
I'm really sorry we tried to have sex on top of you last night.
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
You know, last years football game was epic, but seeing the same girl that gave you a bj in the parking lot, in the same parking spot...that's fate.
3 things. 1) we need alcohol 2) we need alcohol 3) we need tortilla chips. Let's make a plan. Bro shakes and salsa.
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
We both got free alcohol and got laid by foreign men last night.
I'm not going out again for the rest of my life. I can't top this.
Nothing quite like the "I had sex you a month ago and now we're stopped at the same 4 way" wave
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
My hook-up from last week somehow found me at the club, saw the girl I was trying to fuck, kissed me right in front of her, and walked off.
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
Randomize