Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
I woke up naked by my window. blinds open. smiley face drawn on my window.
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
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red lips, whiskey sips, shaking hips, nipple slips. my life as a rap song.
Dear future Eric, sorry about the Everclear. Sincerely, Eric +2 shots E.C.
I was just informed that I have the perfect belly button for body shots... Best compliment ever.
There is blood on my sheets, we apparently used 8 towels, everything in my shower is knocked down. Wut?
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
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he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
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