My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
I just Organized my jello shots by their colors in my mini fridge for the rest of the week. I'm going places in life.
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
we've decided whoever is stupid enough to use the condom that's tacked to the wall deserves to get pregnant.
We're downstairs cleaning up and she turns to me with these big puppy dog eyes and says "Just so you know, I didn't have sex on your couch". You have to hug that.
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
Do you remember trying to make pizzas with the domino workers last night...while trying to speak their language with them.. spanish?
So you told me to remind you that you vomited 3 times in the street because you would forget so here is your reminder
Just woke up with an entire pack of Oreos in my cheetah onesie. I've been waiting for this moment forever.
There are both cum and chocolate stains on my sheets. Can't decide whether this is a new low or a new high.
Do not tell guys at bars about kittens you rescue. They will walk away.
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
Well as if this year didn't suck enough already, I can now count 2015 as the year I got chlamydia
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
Randomize
