I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
Whoa. I woke up to 10 new text messages. All about bacon.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
I waited so long to accept his friend request that he canceled it. So I added him and when he accepted I deleted him. I wonder how long this will be funny to me
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
You know it was a good weekend when; you leave a bi-lingual letter of apology on top of a stack of cash for hotel housekeeping.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I dont think that yelling at the medic "Christmas is gone, fuck off santa" was the best idea when you couldnt feel your legs.
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
I know you're asleep, but I just had a motherfucking epiphany.
We inadvertently arrived at the strip club on Bear Night. The dancers all look like young Santa Claus and there's a buffet....
My roommate just yelled at me for coughing. I'd like to yell at her for doing lines off our counter last night.
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
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