nut hugger
My nephew just came out playing with my moms vibrator.
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots
He's like a unicorn and I just wanna domesticate him
He was so high he started playing Twister on the striped rug. Then when we missed midnight he went on a screaming rampage about his New Year's Eve being meaningless. How do you think it went?
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
He fingered me to the beat of the Fresh Prince theme song... it was pretty fantastic.
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
Actually new year, new me. I haven’t had sex yet so technically I’ve been a virgin all year.
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
I don't think you understand I turned down McDonalds for you.
Randomize
