RAWRRRR IMA PURPLE DINO
dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
im sitting in the back of my pickup eating an artichoke. please come find me, im scared.
that was a mass text, wasnt it?
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
A guy in a banana suit just got the whole bus to participate in a call and response version of Bohemian Rhapsody. HERO
The three yr old girl I nanny grabbed a pole just now and is chanting "this is my house"
Sounds like you at that dive bar last weekend
you walked in, put on rap music and started chugging vodka
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
all I remember is screming at her "I want you and your tortillas... DEAD"
my downstairs neighbor came by to say he’s having a huge loud party tomorrow, handed me a toblerone bar, and said thank you in advance for your understanding
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