It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
My niece just called my sister in law a teabagger. I love NPR and it's corrupting influence on small children
When I was in the bathroom and wiped with a paper towel I found in the trashcan, I realized that this might be the reason I have a yeast infection.
Just filled the brita up in the bathtub because we couldn't get it into the sink.
One of those nights had to have been when we tried to walk through the McDonald's drive through -- and then got in the car with complete strangers. And stole their hamburgers.
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
While the bouncer was checking my purse, he found a bag of pasta noodles in it and asked me why I put them in my purse. I said to him: "So the guy knows I can cook."
You went into the shower with my roommate and cursed him out asking why he was there
wow thanks for pushing me towards an older man
you gotta start somewhere if you're going to be a trophy wife
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
Kids music just accidentally came on at this party. I didn't know how many stoners were here until they all sang along.
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
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