I had a wet dream about my mom last night. words can't even begin to discribe how scarred I am. what. the. fuck.
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
casually drinking alone with your cats. do they like sparks?
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
I forgot if I was chewing my gum or my tongue
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
I'm petting the cat while shitting. This is all I ever wanted
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay?
He showed up to a booty call with 2 tea bags, but no condom...
I told him to send me a dick snap for my birthday. To personalize it, he drew a candle coming out of the tip of it so I could blow it out.
What the fuck were you guys talking about?
Lube wrestling.
Oh, makes sense.
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
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