PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
she's like the human form of herpes, as soon as you think she's gone for good you have another out break.
new number. flushed my phone last night when i puked, made B help me look for it for 2 hours.
I was just walking through Burbank and saw a hobo using solar panels on his shopping cart. We must be in trouble if the hobos are researching alternative sources of fuel...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
he told me he wanted to get "words" tattooed on his penis so he could say hes always putting words in my mouth..
I like how washing the beer bong is now a regular part of washing the dishes.
She left me a voicemail too. It's just her moaning her name repeatedly
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The best way to start drinking is as early as possible. eg, this bar isn't open but we're patiently waiting outside. That way you're confident and exciting when the talent arrives. Or too drunk to care.
It was either the harsh truths I was divulging or the liquor..... But either way, I made mom puke
Don't patronize me, I thought of that on peyote, so it was basically like a message from God.
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
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