wait so...it's like an actual thing to masturbate using the detachable shower head? WTF I thought I was being creative!
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
I remembered to bring wine in a nalgene bottle, but I forgot sunscreen and water. I'm starting to question my life decisions.
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
If I get there and all he has for my big valentines surprise is his body, I'm dumping his ass and posting his dirty pictures on a porn site so people can laugh at him.
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
I just smoked by myself in my childhood bedroom, how happy does it seem I am to be home for Christmas?
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
I walk into the pharmacy and I'm like "I need three morning after pills" and the guy was like "uhhhh". All I said was "we didn't plan it, we all just got laid the same night"
Yeah well I fucked my ex on a sink last night soooo booty calls for us all
oh dont worry mom i am not sick my cough is from a recent increase in recreational drug use
that will happen
Randomize
