I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
So the same day I accidentally bought waterproof mascara is the day I accidentally had shower sex. The world is finally on my side.
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
I want him to come over and snuggle with me but put a bag over his head. Is that rude?
It's not rude if you use a pillowcase that's softer.
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
I'm 99% sure I just puked glitter. Wine drunk Mondays shouldn't be a thing.
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
This is the third time I have overheard parents tell their children "don't be that girl" in reference to me. I'm either doing something horribly wrong or amazingly right
I'm sittin in my Hawaiian shorts watching the office eating cold asparagus. wow do I suck when you're not here.
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
Randomize
