why is every porn film shot in the same house? with the same red couch!?!
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
Hey bro u need to come home now, me and andy just had a 15 minute conversation about fig newtons. f this bong
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
Also I think I'm starting to get calluses on my hands from my level of sexual activity
Lmao I should put that ad on Craigslist "in need of muscular and determined team of men to carry drunken birthday whore safely home"
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
my last search of the night was "the physics of green eggs and ham" what the fuck
I watch one musical on Netflix, and the "Suggested for you" section is literally almost the entire gay movie category. I feel profiled, and netflixs' accuracy about my sexuality is both impressive and offensive.
I know we were going to go hiking today, but I don’t think I can face reality until Wednesday
My sister just poured me a dbl Ciroc on the rocks and said "the ice makes it festive." Honestly what a role model.
The only words I could make out were "Dicksmash McIroncock".
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
try to milk me bitch
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