Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
sometimes i wish i was a boob, they get to chill in soft and cuddly little cup things.
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
Dude in front of me just jumped out of line at Starbucks to go puke. Vegas in prime form.
Charles Darwin would shit his pants if he saw that we managed to survive that weekend.
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
I also got a mission for you and you're gonna love it. Biggest. Hospital. Party. Ever.
You kept yelling "NO CAPES" at me for no apparent reason
"I feel morally obligated to vote for him since he's my drug dealers dad"
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
my mom is drunk and is trying to get me to take a picture of her ass. what is life?
Randomize
