How old was that tiny chick? she needs a lard iv.
Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
I think my hot accountant is wearing banana republic. I miss the days when that ='ed gay. Signals are so confusing now.
Every time he makes fun of me for anything I just remind myself he ate ice cream out of a strippers vagina
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there's a taquito in the driveway. If it's not yours I'm going to eat it.
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
He just asked if I would make his black snake moan. Dating basketball players is not worth the glory
She just made out with a golden retriever. I'm disgusted and turned on all at once
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
i refuse to sex anyone who doesn't get my lord of the rings references. no exceptions.
Just got a blow job from a woman on a ski slope. She said ski'ing frightens her and giving head calms her down. Glad I could help ma'am!
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
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