I just woke up to a guy kissing me goodbye and leaving for class. I don't know where I am, don't have any clothes on, my underwear are gone, and the shoes I found with my dress aren't mine. He just walked in and gave me my phone. I was on my period. Come get me I will walk to the nearest intersection and wait.
im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
He won't stop licking me..... im choosing your date next time.
And then he dove into my vagina like scrooge mcduck into a room of gold
I decided to start over my porn collection by deleting the old stuff. That was a sad piece of a pie chart...
I'm sitting in the shotgun seat of my car on full recline trying to pretend everything is ok
Sex to movie scores is my best choice of the year. You've had an orgasm but have you had an orgasm with an entire orchestra.
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
Heard I spat fire in your face last night. Wish I could say that I'm sorry
House vote, we're revoking your 151 privileges
I'm sorry.
She did what?
Who. The correct term is she did who.
Did you see him? The correct term is definitely what.
As in, legitimately worried. You just sent me a 6 message long text that did not contain any complete words.
she brought her phone charger to the bar this bitch is ready to drink
I hate being the first one to text him all the time...I feel like Iook desperate to get laid when the reality is that im just really horny and he has a/c...
Randomize
