Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
guys are not supposed to queef...right?
i just picked a peanut m&m up off the floor. with my toes. and then proceeded to eat it.
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
i just won "most creative" category in the condom contest in human sexuality by licking it onto a cucumber. my feedback forms included three phone numbers, one with a Magnum XL taped to it
stumbled upon a picture of an owl staring me in the face. i almost offered him a bong hit.
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
when you greet her, try not to lead with "this night will end with you on top of me". first impressions, bro.
Lets be real here, you loved it when I was on top. With and without the machete.
Also, I'm sat on the floor drinking cava because life is just not working for me tonight.
I made him laugh his dick is mine
Quick I need a sexy way to say "suck your balls"
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
Randomize
