he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
I just sat in the Taco Bell drive-thru waiting for a trash can to take my order. Yes, that high.
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
Ideas for halloween. We need simple yet hilarious. Cheap yet effective. Slutty yet acceptable. Go.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's not meant to be. I also just shot a turkey baster of gin into Nate's eye, so....
I feel bad for the cleaning lady. All you can smell is latex and Jaegermeister
You don't have a penis so I'm not texting you at this hour. This is penis texting hour only.
I borrowed a glass of wine. And the bottle. Your cat said it was ok
Did you get an erection too during Paul Ryan's speech?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
We found you wrapped up in a tarp in the garage the next morning, thats how real shit got.
She's started this new thing where whenever she drives by random couples talking alone outside she yells "break up! this is your sign!"
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
So about that you can bill me for the chair but it was David's idea to jump from the window sill into the washer with "clothing pillows of cloudiness" to land on to get ahold of him you have to phone his mother
I just talked to her she really hates you like a lot
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
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