i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
I think I've hugged the toilet more times than I've hugged my own family members.
You know, be my cock's hype man.
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
I might've decided it was a good idea to try to steal all of the pool balls at the pub... I apologize in advance that we now need to become regulars somewhere (anywhere) else.
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
I'm all about sex. But even I know there will be a time to retire my junk. And that will be my 40th birthday, or whenever I'm hideous
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
At one point my little brother was Rocky Balboa'd by a stripper's tit
Dude I am a waste of space, I just febreezed myself so I could go out and get lunch
You waddled all the way home with your shoes in a construction cone. I'm glad to call you my Bestfriend.
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
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