I only kidnapped one of them. chill
his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
I just found out how hard it is to put together a fake Christmas tree with a hangover.
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell
Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those
Fair warning, if I start singing "Kiss Me, I'm Shitfaced" at any point tomorrow, just go with it
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
I wanna snuggle with you as we feed each other chipotle burrito bowls and that's just where I'm at right now
I swear 2020 just keeps getting worse and worse
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