You really coming over, don't trick.
I have got to lose weight!! Apparently no one wants to fuck a fat chick with herpes.
Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
He turned down a handjob. A HANDJOB. I know I'm no Jessica Simpson, but...
Actually, she's fat now, so...
Fuck. I AM Jessica Simpson.
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
Randomize
